details

it's all in the details. here's some i owe you.
i was faced with an important decision tonight. i wanted to do something naughty. my choices lay before me: turn on the AC, or have taco bell for dinner. each opportunity carried with it a disdain for sustainability, a crass kiss off to nature.
you know what i picked. in my defense, i went vegetarian.
no but really. i was feelin pretty bad last week...i was deep in regret. so i let him know, i was having second thoughts. and he responded beautifully...which reminded me why i invited him in the first place.
and, getting all worked up about him and then letting go did something great for me; it taught me to not be so emotionally invested in this boy. which is something i knew, but wasn't ready to do. so this helped get me there, with very little pain relatively speaking.
i've been considering cutting back on pot lately. which is weird, because i've been a smoker on and off but mostly on for 15 years. but i was in a meeting today, and wasn't lively, wasn't contributing. i didn't like that. also my therapist called me out. which is weird because i'm stoned in there like ALL the time. but she noticed.
so i dunno. it could be helpful to not HAVE to be stoned on dates just so i can eat a decent meal.
speaking of a decent meal!! i went out with the engineer boy again. the one i picked up on the train. just happened to miss his flight and i got a swank lunch out of it. brunch, actually, complete with champagne and creme brulee! YUM!! what a weekend. on fyah.
so i'm trying to pull back on the monster, just a bit. in a good way. i dig.
i dig love. <3