progression

so i talked to my EX today. the real EX. not the current ex. the one that i tore up and spit out. the one that locked my heart in the attic for a year.
it was nice.
no really, it was. peaceful. he wanted to talk more about the past, our evolution than i did. i really just wanted to catch up. but it was good. we both talked about both.
but, i felt ready. i felt it's part of my big picture healing process.
and then i was super stoked to know i ditched him bc apparently he's become a libertarian. omg!!! so funny. i hate them the most. = )

i can kinda feel the movie guy is gonna be clingy. not sexy hot desperate clingy, but too soon too insecure clingy. i'll ride this one out another week or two, but it will be easy to lose- just use the ex excuse. it'll work and i'll sound like a martyr.

my crush on the young one is out of control. i wish it would go away. either that, or that he'd reach out to me. for some boo-tay. yeah.

i spent a lot of time lately with the ex. not the big scary capital ex from the first bit of phone call recap, but the current love. in bed, lots. it's like, pretty good. better than usual. but i really am being controlling, and the jealousy is pervasive. if he knew i'd be dating & talking to people he'd be so sad. yet for me...it's different.
anyway, i'm hoping i'll just progress out of it over time...

the professor. still the same. texty text. i wish he'd just see me for christ's sake.

and then the med student. that one...i'll just wait. sit and wait. what's meant to be will be, right? he's out there. not sure if i'm THAT out there...i know parts of me are. maybe he could bring those parts out in me...maybe their the best parts of me and i don't even know it!! ha. as i said, i'm sittin on that one.

apparently this was update on all my crushes blog. as if all the others are not.

(then i guess i should mention the chick. she's around. will see her again. ugggh. so hot.)